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Tate McRae ladies and gentlemen. She has the power to wreck people. Her new album I used to think I could fly could easily have wrecked my life if I had a previous toxic relationship, but I do not. Her songs have taken over tik tok and I would be surprised if you said you hadn’t heard any of them. Some of her more popular songs include “she’s all I wanna be,” “you broke me first,” “chaotic” and “that way.” She is only 19 years old and is the older sister we all never had. Her music is very relatable, talking about the common struggles that happen within relationships and the fears/ insecurities everyone has. Jealousy, self-worth, initial denial after a heartbreak, acceptance and moving on are all topics she hits upon. Some say her style of music falls in between pieces of Billie Eilish and Olivia Rodrigo, who are both very popular in the music industry right now. This new album consists of 12 songs and 1 introduction clip that’s 16 seconds. It has gained massive attention due to the advertisement of early released songs from the album over social media. Read below for the breakdown of Tate’s album that easily broke my heart even more than it already is broken. 

“Don’t come back”

The first song of the album is “dont come back” which is a slower song as it begins but gets slightly faster as the song progresses. This song is really about moving on from her relationship with this person and accepting what has happened. She realizes she is above how she was treated after being lied to and doesn’t want her ex to come running back to her. She sings

"If you wanna go ahead and lie to me
Throw it all out now, that's fine with me, uh
If I'm not enough for you, honestly
I hope you don't come back
"

Tate ultimately knows she is better off without him.

“I’m so gone”

Tate has resentment for her ex and calls him out on the fact he always said things he never truly meant. She sings

“You promised that the two of us were fate, isn’t it funny how you said that after pushing me away?”

She recognizes how he could come running back begging to get back together, but she will just shrug it off because he caused her this pain and she now despises him.

"Don't be calling my name
When I'm so gone, I hope that you hate it
"

Tate directly calls out the jealousy and spite he had for her career.


"Never left your dad's basement
Now you're mad that I made it
"

Like many other people at the end of their breakup, Tate brings up jealousy in the relationship and how she moves past it. This song is very relatable for many people.

“What would you do?”

“What would you do?” was one of 4 songs released early after Tate released the chorus’ of the songs on Tik Tok. This is more of an upbeat song compared to the others on the album and she proposes the question in the chorus: “what would you do if I leave and don’t come back?” of what would her ex do if she left and never came back. This is a classic break-up anthem that hits upon the idea that he couldn’t begin to imagine the pain she went through when he left her. Tate acknowledges he didn’t treat her right and karma could come right for him if she left him and never went back. It is clear she was taken for granted as she sings

"I've always been a nice girl
I'm pretty understanding
But you mess up my head, boy
And you're taking me for granted
And you're probably gonna throw a fit 
When I call you out on all your s***"

“Chaotic”

Chaotic is a more heart-rendering song filled with lyrics that dig into our insecurities.

The first line of the song opens with

“I have a paralyzing fear that I’ll maybe go nowhere” 

which stresses her fear of abandonment but more generally her severe anxiety.

As the song progresses it is clear she had to move on from her ex but she still reminisces the times they did have singing

“I really think that I miss him It might seem stupid but I still look through all of our texts”

Each person in the relationship is at different points in their lives but that doesn’t change the fact they still care about each other. They are going through major changes and having a difficult time processing the reality of things.

“Nobody said changing would be this exhausting”

Chaotic is a good song to listen to if you want to reminisce on the relationship as a whole and if you feel like you aren’t coping well with your life-changing.

“Hate Myself”

This is easily my favorite song written on the album because it hits upon our insecurities of being the problem in the relationship.

"You couldn't hate me more than I hate myself
I'd always act so selfish at s*** I hadn't dealt with"

It is a fear everyone carries around with them whether its a romantic relationship or even a friendship. This is a raw emotion most artists don’t sing so directly. She feels an immense amount of guilt knowing the pain she had put her ex through and admits she is selfish. She realizes she has caused herself to feel the pain of knowing she had done everything to drive him away. She reflects on her actions and admits to realizing she was too caught up in her own thoughts to realize when he said he would leave, he actually would. This song is well written and would be great if you were in your feels. 

“What’s your problem” 

This song is specifically about being in a toxic relationship in which her ex “made [her] hate herself just so [she] would love [him] more”. He took advantage of the fact she was in a vulnerable state to begin with and only made her hate herself more. Tate sings about all of the toxic things he had that made their relationship ultimately fail and ruin her as a whole. His arrogance:

“You think that you’re a god,”

the fact he blindsided her identity

“Tried to make me more like you and less like me,”

and all of the red flags she had seen but ignored

 “I should’ve known when my mom said she don’t like you.”

In this situation and unfortunately many others, ignorance can be bliss when you are in a toxic relationship because you don’t realize the harm it is doing to you.

“She’s all I wanna be”

“She’s all I wanna be” is about knowing there is someone bigger and better than us and fearing being left for someone else. Specific to Tate’s relationship she is referring to the girl her ex had picked over her; from her point of view she has some resentment, jealousy and devastation that she ultimately can’t “compete”. Everyone sees their own flaws but we all know there will be someone “better” than us.

"She's got everything that I don't have
How could I ever compete with that?"

She acknowledges she can’t come close to the other girl and expresses her fear of being forgotten.

"She'll wear a tight mini black dress
With all her friends around
And then you'll probably spend the night at
Her nice big house
And by then, I'll just be someone
You've forgotten about"

“Boy x”

Tate describes in “boy x” the feeling of being betrayed after said boy x had cheated on her with other girls. It is a slower song like most songs of the album but she is sad she had gotten hurt after she thought she had done all she could to protect herself.

When boy x walked into her life she turned from the “girl with the toughest of skin” who “made sure everyone around knew that she wasn’t sensitive” into a girl who fell with the glimpse of his eyes. Tate sings to her ex to not make the next girl “feel like she’s the only thing [he’s] seeing” so she will know not to become invested in someone who isn’t fully there.

She is blinded by the fact that “she really thought he was forever then forever was dead” and ultimately captures the feeling of heartache after thinking what they had was real.

“You’re so cool”

Similar to “What’s your problem?”, “You’re so cool” is upbeat and about her ex’s arrogance. In the pre-chorus, she sings

“You take all your issues
Blame 'em on everyone else
I bet that if you could you'd go on a date with yourself”

She specifically sings about how she settled for less in a guy and regrets ever being with him because he had qualities many people strive not to have: being self-centered and narcissistic.

"But all your best friends really hate you too
Every time I hear your name, why's it make me sick?
Ooh it's driving me insane that I'm not over it"

Overall, this is more of an upbeat song that is great because she is almost saying she lived and she learned. She knows her worth and she won’t settle for anyone like him ever again. It is important to have someone that will add to your life not take away.

“Feel like s***”

This has been released for a while and has become a very popular song of hers. This is more of a depressing, melancholy song that is great for your feels because she reminisces on her past relationship and admits she is having a hard time moving on but physically can’t. She does everything she can but she can’t return to how she normally feels.

"And I still feel stuck in my lungs
And usually I go out on nights
And not think of you once
But if they start playin' that song"

Her body is catching up to her and everything she does reminds her of her ex. This is a common emotion most people endure at the end of breakups.

“Go away”

In ‘go away’ she can’t move on from him because she is still so in love with him and he has moved on so she wants to. She is filled with a little bit of resentment because she wants things to be reciprocated but at the same time, she knows she can’t hope for that and wants to move on. She says she sees him everywhere

"Oh, I've been stuck seeing your face in everyone"

Due to the fact her mind is still on him even though she doesn’t want him to be, she hates how sometimes he cares about her and other times he doesn’t.

"You seem to love when I'm alone
You like to care until you don't"

He isn’t consistent with his actions and its hurting her emotionally and mentally. She sings

"Now I don't think I'm okay
You never go away"

“I still say goodnight”

“I still say goodnight” is about doing the best person you can in a relationship but not having feelings reciprocated. More specifically seeing the signs they are losing interest but ignoring them because you want the relationship to work. Tate says no matter how hard she tried to show him she cared he didnt value her. 

"Got so dressed up and no you never seemed to care
Your ridiculous expectations, lack of validations"

She continued to push and try until she realized her ex only stayed with her because he was scared to be lonely. She says she feels stupid cause she still says goodnight, implying she continued to care but also there were signs he stopped caring and ignored them.

"You stopped saying, "Goodnight"
That was the first sign that you were letting go"

The Final Verdict

She has stronger pieces in the album and i expected there to be more upbeat songs than there were due to the previously released songs before the whole album was released. I am excited to see what she puts out in the future given the songs in this album. She always sings about relatable topics which makes her songs really stick out. My favorites of the album are definitely “don’t come back”, “hate myself” and “go away”.

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